d e s p a i r of t h o u g h t t h e n o n (o r i s it s o) existence o f d e b o n a i r

It comes the time in every persons life when he wonders out loud "isn't there anything holy anymore?" And by this im not referring to the belief of god or anything religious related, im referring to those values, those convictions, that for some, are so powerful that they are able to stir up feelings that are similar to the fervor that in the past was felt towards the supposed deities and the cult to worship them.

Apparently so, such convictions have become more scarce than an honest man in Congress, the unavoidable result is that, since there is nothing holy anymore people are able to commit constant stomping (or chomping? or puking-on) on those convictions and values and opinions. The second unavoidable result is that since there is a total disrespect for those values, the few and appalling minorities who still hold them dear are obviously truly affected by the inequity of evil men.

It is even possible that this unfairness that emanates from the work of these men is of, let us say, sufficient size, to wrap us up and fling us into a void filled with despair, when we are in the middle of this vacuity, we realize that the biggest reason for our despair is our inability to reach a logic conclusion that would enable us to form a logic cause-effect relation that would be able to explain, at least to ourselves, the reason why we are in this non-place with only darkness surrounding us. The other feeling we have in the middle of our downward spiraling trip is the feeling that there is no ledge in which we can seek support, no protruding flagpost which could be our savior from the vertiginous and violent fall we are about to endure, of course, after we realize that there is no place to fall to this stress causing anguish is mitigated.

Well, the thing is, the actual conundrum that we are involved in, is what are our best options now that we are involved in all this downwardspiralingjourneysthroughdarkandemptyvoids?, our first option is to simply drift, to fall down and try to enjoy the fall, to feel the wind blowing through your hair, constantly remembering you that you are in movement, and towards the wrong direction we might add, to get that bizarre pleasure you get when you are involved in free falling adventures ala tower of terror. The other way out, in my opinion is to abstract.

In order to abstract, you must first of all, forget the notion that right now you are in a void, in a state of mind where one of the pillars of your existence has just been crushed with one of those funky demolition balls, and simply concentrate on BEING, this is the time when you need to focus on the mundane and prosaic, you need to dare to endure existence for a few days like those beings you despise so much. This is the time when it is of utmost importance that you allow yourself to rely on the common, on the worldly and just for a few moments (or is it days?) allow the deep and transcendental to be forgotten, this is when you have to let the banjo back line rhythm of the favorite song to absorb you in a way that it is your only concern in the universe, when you need to stop and be swept away by the poetry of the images of a favorite movie (why not Kubrik? its when you need to change paradigms and start seeing the world not through your usual rationale but through the tainted green of the bottle of wine you just downed. When you accept that it WILL be socially accepted of you to be in a mood that prevents you from raising your voice above a determined level (which by the way happens to be quite low), when you embrace the notion that in this precise time your best friend is called melancholy and that you simply desire to, for at least a week, to drop the sword and stop this absurd and endless crusade against what ever that you are up against, achieve this, and probably, sometime soon you'll realize that you have stopped falling (if the loud thud didn't give that away)

That way we reach the conclusion that in reality, there is still a remnant of debonair in this world, that we refuse to be shoved the constant lies that because of the sins of Adam we have lost the privilege of paradise or even simple happiness in this earth, we are determined to see the glass half full and to, at least through wishful thinking or abstract perception, to encounter the beauty of this ironic off Broadway musical, that in the end life is not a drama but a comedy for those with dark humor, and believe us, dark humor we have and we are hardheaded in our purpose to get the greatest number of laughs out of it, even, if it takes a considerable amount of laughing at ourselves.